What an unruly sitting, what an unholy rabble. I speak of Parliamentarians and their meeting in the august House by the Diyawanna on Monday 21st.
The rabble roused in Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar first met in a street in the market place in Rome to celebrate the victorious return of their greatest general - Julius Caesar. Then again, to hear Brutus explain why he and his co-Senators assassinated this noble Roman accused of being over-ambitious. The mob turned against Caesar only to turn against Brutus and others by Mark Anthony’s “I come to bury Caesar not praise him” speech to the point of maddening them with anger to chase the conspirators out of home and town and pillage and set fire to their homes. The Roman rabble in the first century BC were rousing against historic history being created.
A pharmaceutical accusation!
What were our local rabble MPs vociferously shouting about even while being televised live and with a foreign delegation in the visitors’ gallery? Viagra, yes Viagra, that aphrodisiacal treatment of a condition called ED. Don’t ask this modest spinster cat, (who has however missed nothing in life – three cheers to her!) - for an unravelling of those initials. Yes, refers to a dysfunction but not this cat who will pronounce the first word. Well, judging by the grey beards and paunches exhibited by many parliamentarians, it is not surprising Viagra became a topic of argument descending to the ridiculous and shouts of accusation of use and denial. No Sir, Not I Sir, I don’t use Viagra Sir, but he does! This feline heard it all, enjoying the TV transmission of Parliamentary proceedings but interspersed with many a tinkling or buzzing sound as the censor cut in on speeches belted out.
The name of the drug was bandied around freely; some accusing others of being users; the older braving the storm and one red oldie shouting out filth. A picture predominates in the recollecting mind: Vasu frenetic in abuse and Ranil amused and making a clever quip.
A newspaper on Tuesday 22 November carried a front page news item: “Viagra dominates morning session” with “Deputy Minister Ranjan Ramanayake insisting members shouldn’t gratify their carnal desires at the expense of the President’s Fund.” This remark was accompanied by a sanctimonious comment that he does not mind persons using the drug but not taking money off public coffers to buy it. This said intervening in the parry and thrust between Keheliya Rambukwella and Kurunegala District MP Nalinda Bandara who accused Rambukwella of taking money off needy children to pay for his stay in an Australian hospital. Aha! People recall how he tried to get into the adjoining room for some fun and games – oops sorry, tried to get out of his room, his door getting locked or some such thing. Imposs we said, in a five star hotel. (The last lot never stayed in less starred hotels; it was five and above for them). He got onto the ledge of his window and was inching his way forwards, when he fell and injured not only the plants in the hotel garden but his legs too. How was he going to get his locked door open by walking along the outside ledge of his room? Didn’t he think of telephoning or even banging on the said door?
An editorial in a newspaper dubbed the arguing MPs bats - “Old bats on Viagra” -because a certain species of these nocturnal mammals, the Editor elucidated, go raping both male and female bats, with no extraneous stimulation whatsoever. So sex-driven are they! Think of those creatures who hang like crumpled blackish bags from tree branches all day long getting urged no sooner darkness falls.
What’s OK then is not OK now
This news item was rich, truly rich. Mahinda Rajapaksa is critical of the government leasing 15.000 acres in Hambantota to the Chinese. This cat did not know whether to laugh or cry, but she sure felt utter disdain. Our politicians are so well described by a ditty kids chanted long ago. The two lines sung described the tall, crimson pillbox caps worn by Muslims those days as a bambuwa which when he dances is like a sembuwa. It noted that the Muslim man’s headgear depicted inconsistency. That is what the leader of the JO has shown in his latest pronouncement. He says he welcomes investment but not selling our resources. Who sold so much land, or even gifted it, not only on Mother Earth but even to-be-made land on sea? He, MR. He danced to the Chinese tune of building a harbour with a huge rock in it, and an airport far too close to wildlife reserves. And now he ticks the government about being overgenerous to the Chinese, while holding onto an invitation from the said Chinese to come visit their highly developed land. C V Wigneswaran who retracted a controversial statement he made some time ago, dropped another bombshell recently. He said that AAVA, the unruly bike riders of Jaffna, “is politically motivated and assisted by the Army.” He did not elaborate. That is unthinkable. Those who have long memories and recollect the beginnings of the most ferocious terrorists on the face of the earth – the LTTE - only hope these AAVA bods are not Boys raising their heads soon to be ferocious fighters.
CVW waxed eloquent on the benefits and lack of danger of federalism. He compared it to a landowner who has a large house on his property. His children grow up and as rightful heirs to his land, have sections apportioned to them and they build homes and all live happily ever after. That’s a fairy story. In reality, one sibling wants more than another; he may cast his covetous eye on the mulgedera, and encroach. He may even, through greed for land and power, commit patricide and matricide. So, no thanks Mr Wigneswaran. No federalism for Sri Lanka. We will remain one nation with races living amicably. Not the slightest of separation of the North and no joining the North and the East. The government is doing much to right injustices; they are sticking their necks out in helping the Tamil people. So Guv, do not rock the boat. Free Sri Lanka must continue to be a single state.