Here are some tips to boost your willpower
Face your fears
“People who are not moving towards their goal are often afraid of something they envisage happening as a result of achieving the goal,” says Bak-Maier. “I really struggled to finish my third book. Yes, it’s a great thing to aim for; I really wanted to do it. Eventually, I realised that I was subconsciously afraid of the book failing and no one buying it. Worse, once it was written, I knew I’d have to go out and market it. I dread marketing.” When faced with taking action on your goal. Chances are good that you might be too anxious to pursue it.
Spend willpower wisely
Imagine you have planned to go to the gym after work even though you have had a gruelling day at the office and a grim commute. Instead, you spend the evening slumped on the couch chomping crisps. You’ve earned it, right? That is ego depletion in action.
You use your willpower reserves. Go to the gym or start writing that screenplay early in the day, even if you don’t consider yourself to be a morning person. Why? Because, unfortunately, the brain does not compartmentalise tasks that require uncomfortable effort.
There is no special brain area marked “willpower for writing”. If you spend hours agreeing with your boss in a tedious meeting (it takes more willpower to suppress your views than to express them freely), don’t be surprised that you mysteriously have no energy for your own goals later. Find your motivation
It seems we all hold some willpower back in reserve. Researcher Mark Muraven found that study participants suddenly discovered extra self-control to do a task after they were told they would be paid for their effort, or that their effort would benefit others, such as helping to find a cure for a disease. So knowing your “why” can help you to get out
It may sound like magical thinking but the researchers found that the ability to generate such “memories” was crucial for experiencing a sense of self-continuity, a vital component in taking action on our goals.
Learn from setbacks
Set a distinction between a lapse and a relapse, says Ryan. “Say you go back to smoking every day for a month; that’s a relapse. But if you have an occasional cigarette, use that as a learning experience. Ask yourself: ‘Why did I smoke that time? I went out with my mates, we had a bit to drink and then I had a cigarette outside the pub because they were all smoking.’ Label that as a risk. ‘
What will I do next time? Next time I’ll be more on my guard, I’ll say I’ve given up, so I’m not going to join you, I’ll just stay inside.’ Very simple strategies for what’s known as an implementation plan.” Don’t be discouraged
Finally, be kind to yourself. “Anticipate lapses and plan for them,” says Ryan. “Don’t blame yourself. Be compassionate when you have a setback. Reward yourself for effort, not outcomes.
Changing habits, or establishing new ones, is a motivational marathon, with inevitable trips along the way.Feeling negative and emotionally charged drains your willpower battery. Negative moods are the enemy of willpower, and self-blame is the main culprit.”