Good resolutions are simply cheques that men draw on a bank where they have no account. - Oscar Wilde
As the New Year – 2023 – is approaching, a special countdown begins. That is when you make a resolution such as “I’m going to reduce my weight … I’ll quit smoking, or get more exercise.”
Surely, you had made such resolutions in the past. Despite your best intentions, most of those resolutions have gone with the wind. Does it mean that New Year resolutions are meaningless? “Definitely not,” said James Prochaska , a behavioural scientist in the United States.
“It takes courage to change, and the psychological impact of a New Year can give us just the boost we need.” It means if you make any New Year resolution without proper thought, you are doomed to fail. Sometimes it is worse than making a resolution. G. Alan Marlatt, a professor of psychology, has conducted studies of New Year resolutions. He said, “The backslider feels bad about himself and begins to discount the importance of making any personal changes.”
Some people are, however, made of sterner stuff. One of them would say, “I can do it!” Such people are capable of keeping a resolution without backsliding. Then the question arises whether it is possible to make New Year resolutions stick. The trouble with many people who make New Year resolutions is that they do not plan ahead.
For instance, if you wish to make a New Year resolution, do not wait until the end of the old year. Sometimes they make resolutions on the spur of the moment without thinking how they are going to carry them out. The last two weeks of the old year is an ideal time to make resolutions.
Pluses and minuses
You can identify a bad habit you want to change. Before making the resolution, consider the pluses and minuses carefully. The positive side of giving up smoking can be, ‘I’ll be able to save a lot of money wasted on cigarettes.” Another plus point would be, “My health will improve and my wife and children will not become passive smokers.”
The negative side might be that some of your friends who smoke will not associate with you. Now weigh the pros and cons and decide whether the benefits motivate you enough to overcome the difficulties.
Once you have decided on your resolution, put it in writing. Select the words that force you to give up smoking. Also mention how you are going to give up smoking. Are you going to do so at once or in stages? They are hard decisions for a smoker. However, if you are making a resolution genuinely, you can do it and reap the benefits.
Some people make many New Year resolutions instead of one. Research shows that if you make many resolutions at the same time, you will not stick to any one of them. Therefore, try to make a single resolution and stick to it. Your attempt to turn over a completely new leaf can be self-defeating. Focus on a single target and be single-minded about achieving it.
Learning French
Marshall Lumsden made a New Year resolution to learn French to spend his holidays in France. Although he started learning French, he could not master the language due to pressure of work. However, in the following year he made a firm resolution to learn the language and completed the course commendably. Then, he left for France and spent his holidays.
If you are keen on making a New Year resolution, be specific. If you resolve to make yourself a better person in the New Year, you will not achieve your target. What do you mean by “better person?” Your resolution should state what you are going to do in the New Year. A young government employee who was unhappy in his job made a resolution “I’ll find a better job” and worked hard to realise his ambition. Eventually he left his job and found a better position in a business organisation.
You have to bear in mind three important elements before making a New Year resolution. In the first place, you must be happy about your resolution. You should not make a resolution simply to satisfy the whims and fancies of your wife and children.
For instance, some smokers resolve to quit smoking on their own. Others do so under outside pressure. Not surprisingly, the self-motivated has the better track record.
Some students make New Year resolutions to do better in their studies under pressure from their parents. No matter how their parents push them, they will never study hard. If a student decides for himself that he wants to be successful in life, he will begin to get top grades.
Sometimes, parents can warn their children saying that they will not get jobs if they do not study and pass examinations. Such external pressure can subtly be internalised.
If you have made a resolution to give up smoking, announce it to others boldly. Tell your peers that you are going to do so for health reasons. Edward Lichtenstein who studied a large number of ex-smokers found 85 percent had told others that they were quitting. Another way to break a bad habit is to seek the support of your spouse or best friend. They will keep on reminding you that you have made a resolution not to continue with your bad habit.
Successful resolutions
Research shows that it is easier to start a good habit than to break a bad habit. The most successful resolutions usually combine both. Cut back the evenings with your friends and find a better way of spending your leisure. Substitution works best when two practices are compatible. If you are making a resolution to lose weight, make another resolution to cut back on snacks.
You tend to forget your resolution as the New Year progresses. Therefore, always remind yourself of the resolution you have made. If you have resolved to read a novel every week, do so regularly. It is better to post a reminder on your TV or refrigerator so that you will not forget your own resolution.
Do not strive for the impossible when making New Year resolutions. For instance, you cannot lose weight in a week or two. Therefore, do not impose deadlines but stick to your resolution. Even when you make a realistic resolution, it is important to have a strategy. When you do so, you will not be tempted to backslide.
The dawn of a New Year is a wonderful opportunity for self-improvement. It is a time of hope and renewal. Make a New Year resolution today itself and stick to it.