Heartbreak at the workplace is real and so is the pain. It is very normal to feel dejected, worthless and in pain after a heartbreaking incident at work. You feel dejected and stressed when such things happen and it generally affects your performance.
In other words when you are emotionally wounded, the same region of the brain is stimulated as when you are physically wounded. The pain of rejection, feeling of loneliness, and missing a huge part of your life is real, and they may have physical side effects and it is very normal to feel this way as you attempt to recover from an incident.
A bitter argument with your boss or a colleague, favouritism extended to someone not based on performance, not getting the due respect and appreciation for your work, unfair treatment of any nature, sexual harassment, and the list goes on and on. All these can lead to heartbreaks. Depth and seriousness of the issue and the victim’s emotional status would decide to what extent the issue can mount to. Some situations can leave a bad taste for years which affects long range performance.
Managing heartbreak and work
There may be times that you may feel on the verge of tears or tempted to break down or to go to the bathroom and cry or not go to work at all. But it cannot be denied that our work life is also one of the most important parts of our life so we can’t let go. At first, you may be overwhelmed with sadness, find it hard to focus, or find yourself constantly thinking about what happened. But, if you apply some of the methods discussed below, you may find success in preventing your heart break from affecting your work.
It’s normal to feel sad, angry, or confused after a heartbreak. Don’t squash this down. Running from your feelings only works for so long and eventually they will catch up with you. Let yourself grieve and process these emotions instead of suppressing them. Journaling or talking to a trusted friend can help you make sense of how you feel.
Healing a broken heart takes time, self-care, and patience. Start by allowing yourself to feel your emotions without judgment — it’s truly okay to grieve. Surround yourself with supportive colleagues, friends or loved ones who listen and uplift you.
Focus on activities that bring joy or relaxation, like exercising, pursuing hobbies, or practicing mindfulness. Journaling or speaking with a therapist can help you process your feelings and gain clarity. Remember, healing isn’t linear, but by prioritising your wellbeing and staying open to growth, you’ll gradually move forward and eventually find peace.
When it is a working day for you, try doing little things for yourself, create moments that make you happy like fetching your favorite coffee on the way to work, ordering lunch from your favorite place or wearing an outfit that boosts your confidence. Use these techniques to be kind to yourself.
Confide to relieve
It is okay to be choosy about whom you share this personal news with. Confide in a peer whom you trust that he or she can listen to you without being judgmental. This can lead to the much-needed support. He or she can double check your work schedule or can share little reminders that they are with you no matter what.
If you are a part of a lean and close knitted team there will be chances when people can be invading or intrusive, prepare yourself for this. There will be colleagues who can ask you questions like what happened? Why did you do that? What was the issue? And many more. Answer as much or as little as you are comfortable with; you can choose not to break the news to your co-workers at all.
If your problem is a personal one and not work related, if you feel comfortable, let your boss know that you are dealing with a personal problem and ask for some different or new project so your attention gets directed towards the new activity.
To inform your boss about your issue or not is a choice you can exercise because you would not want to be seen as an in-competent employee and it can be the other way also as maybe it brings you closer to your boss and makes your bond stronger. Reach out to the boss and you can also request to give you something new and interesting to work which can keep you engaged and focused.
Take a break
No matter how hard you try to be strong, there will be days when you will be blank and out. And this sadness can have a serious impact on your work. On such days allow yourself to wrap up a little early or maybe take an off and give yourself the time to grieve. It is important to make yourself realise that you want to move on but grieving is a huge and important part of healing.
Give yourself that time if your body and mind are rejecting work. The most important tip to remember when dealing with a heartbreak is to be kind to yourself. Be mindful of the fact that what you are going through is real, painful and devastating but it is very human to feel this way. Just remember to love yourself and you will be back on your feet in no time.
