Birthday celebrations are great events until you turn 40. Thereafter, you tend to regard each successive birthday as a harbinger of loss. Luckily, for those living in the eventful 21st century, the outlook on getting older is rapidly changing. According to some experts, getting older means getting better in many ways you cannot even imagine.
When grey hair appears in your 40s, you feel devastated. You might run to the hairdresser to get the grey hair dyed. He would tell you that you should dye your hair at regular intervals. Later, you might realise that grey hair does not mean the end of your youth. Sigmund Freud in his great work ‘The interpretation of dreams,’ written when he was 44 and Rachel Carson wrote her classic ‘Silent Spring’ at 55, grey hair did not prevent them from writing their masterpieces.
When you age, you have to read, think and reflect to do something creative. The knowledge you gain improves your intelligence. Therefore, when grey hair appears do not worry about it too much. If you are figure conscious, you can dye your hair. However, most leading authors and eminent people boldly display their grey hair. Most old people score better in intelligence tests than young people. The speed of reasoning and remembering may decrease with age, but not the quality.
Brain cells
It is true that we lose some of our neurons or brain cells with age. However, modern neuroscientists claim that we grow more connecting branches between brain cells which increase our depth of knowledge. If you lead a stimulating life, your brain will work wonderfully even at the age of 80.
As you age, your psychological defence mechanism becomes strong and healthy. Young people act impulsively and make rash decisions. Middle-aged people rely far more on defences such as humour, altruism and creativity.
However, old people do not make rash decisions. They know how to handle stressful situations better than their younger counterparts. The psychologist Janet K. Belsky, author of ‘Here tomorrow: Making the most of life after 50’ says, “With age, we really do cope better with life’s upsets”.
In a way, you need some courage to grow old gracefully. As you cannot stop growing old, you have to cope with it. You may have met many men and women who have gone through a divorce or lost a loved one. They have survived their ordeals. Psychologically, you become tougher with every stressful situation.
Mellowing process
Old people do not get upset in a slow, crowded bus or train. More likely, young people are always in a hurry. The mellowing process you inherit in old age is due to physical changes in the brain. Psychologists have been studying a cluster of cells that could be referred to as the brain’s alarm system involved in arousal, anxiety and fear. In your old age, the alarm system begins to shrink. As a result, you experience a sharp reduction in anger, anxiety and impulsiveness.
Most working people reach their peak in their middle years. It is the time for promotions in your career and other financial benefits. At this time, people look up to you for guidance and leadership. When you reach this age, you also feel that you enjoy a great deal of satisfaction from your work.
As you get older, you are more secure in your relationships. Old people usually do not go for divorce. Most divorce cases involve young people who tend to act impulsively. The longer you have been married, the more likely it is that you are going to stay married. I have met many couples who have celebrated their golden jubilee in marriage. If you have been living with your spouse for several decades, you are very unlikely to go for separation.
It takes a long time to become a matured person. “The older you get, the more unique you become” says psychologist Matti Gershenfeld. As you age, you begin to realise who you are and what you are capable of doing. In a recent study, it was found that a person becomes more compassionate in his old age.
Even if your grown-up children leave you, your nurturing feelings will persist and they can broaden beyond your family circle. As a result, old people tend to help complete strangers who are in need. What is more, it is the old people who are in the forefront of social service organisations. In your old age, there is a strong potential for more involvement with community projects and social services.
New generation
The joy of having children need not be stressed. When children, grandchildren and great grandchildren appear, you will be overcome with a zest for living with a new generation. When you are surrounded by them, you feel that you belong to a special class of people who have a greater sense of connection with the cycle of life.
One of the fears of getting old is that you will be isolated. If you keep in touch with your children and grandchildren, you can nourish your relationships. If you do so, you will have a wide network of lifelong friends, acquaintances, colleagues and an extended family.
In your old age, you may not be able to perform certain functions easily. You will find it difficult to walk long distances or stand for a long time. However, spiritually, you become very strong. Now, you have the time to reflect and make correct decisions. Your faith in religion will deepen and you will become a wiser man.
These are some of the reasons for you to welcome your next birthday.
